Being hot tempered is not necessarily a bad quality in you because you can take several measures to cool down your anger. However if being hot tempered is a quality acquired by birth then you need to put extra efforts to cool off. This blog post explains details of anger and anger management to enable you to adopt suitable measures in improving your life.
Getting Angry
Many writers make a big hullabaloo about people getting angry as if it is the worst thing ever done. This is completely a false argument. Even in mythology, Gods in Greek, Roman and Hindu lore have had enough of temper tantrums. So why is the fuss? It is because the norms of the society demand that everybody suppresses his anger. Aristotle in his writing, however, has mentioned about the concept of “Catharsis” a situation where you let out your feelings so that the resultant situation becomes saner and better. Blowing your fuse at times is as natural as your go for fun and frolic. It can be excused as well. But if you habitually flare up the society shuns you as an angry person; likewise if you start to get physical while in episodes of anger and land few blows on others then you are crossing the red line.
Showing Anger
There are two ways of venting your feelings:
1. Internal Expression of Anger: In this case you keep your anger within your body and mind. This method does help you in the short run but in the long run does lot of harm. You tend to spend endless nights rolling on the bed thinking about the incident. Or you harp on the issue for long time that your elements tune you to be a morose person. By suppressing anger one day you are going to implode within; face a breakdown in heart and other vital organs. Some of you can get into neurosis and complications in connection with the proper functioning of the brain
2. External Expression of Anger: In this case the cathartic effect comes into play. You blast out and that is the end. So you feel relieved unless others are hurt by your rage. There are three ways of showing anger externally:
2.1. You grimace, show a long face or mimic; here you use the face to show your bubble of rage in a muted manner
2.2. You shout, scold or leather out; here you use your voice mainly against family members, business associates, friends and relations or sometimes members of the public
2.3. You use your hands and legs to demonstrate your rage; here it is all physical resulting in damages to your limbs and consequential damages to others as well. This can lead to family disharmony, business related issues and perhaps financial loss
Causes of Anger
Anger can be caused by a single factor or several factors put together. Provocation by others, disappointment, mental hurt, depression, touching the raw nerve by others especially in religion and politics, stress, busy lifestyle are main causes. Women take their anger out on husbands and other family members when their ego is under siege. Moreover, women who do not get sexual satisfaction from their spouses have tend to fly into rage frequently. Brooding behaviour also leads to destructive forms of anger. More than that anger can be caused by characteristics you acquire at the time of birth. This birth related cosmics continue to prevail in you unless mitigatory measures are implemented.
Anger Management
If you blow hot once in a way it does not matter to you or to others. But if you are getting angry habitually you will be branded with “Hot- Tempered” label which is very difficult to take it off on the one hand and on the other hand leads the society at large to shun you. To avoid this situation you should follow a system called anger management. It consists of two types of therapy: one deals with short term cooling down and the other uses long term cooling off.
A) Short term Cooling Down
Here we go like the cowboys fingers on the trigger:
1. Just look out of the window at the sky or trees or at nature
2. Drink a glass of water
3. Splash cool water on your face and if possible daub your chest area with a freshened moist tissue
4. Have a cool drink made from fruits
5. Lie down on the floor for about 4 to 8 minutes
6. Change your seat, close your eyes and count from 1 to 28; by the time you reach 28 your system gets fresh thoughts and sensation. The number 28 relates to the Lunar Mansions
7. Become a baby and sing a nursery rhyme in soft voice
8. If you are unable to control physical urge get the waste paper basket, sit on the floor, pour the contents on the floor, now begin tearing the papers as if you are shredding these, put everything back, now you are done with your anger. A Swedish ceramic manufacturer had a heap of damaged ceramics, stored in his backyard left to be pounded; he was also aware that most employees in ceramic industry get frequently angry. So he circulated a note: If you are not happy with the management go into the backyard and damn those ceramics. He got the result: the employees gave vent to their feelings and the damaged ceramics were pounded to dust
9. Sprawl on your cushioned chair, bring your hands together on the back of your head and rest your head resolutely, put your feet up on the table, close your eyes, now get into dream world, think about your time as a youth, sauntering on beaches with your girl friends, think of your mother and the love and affection she showered on you. Result: you are fully relaxed.
B) Long term Cooling Off
Here you reflect on the basics and allow your cosmics to work for you:
1. Do a self- assessment; Write why are you getting angry frequently, what can be done, whom you should talk to; go thorough the process of understanding you and your present state and how you wish to make your future by keeping cool
2. Consult a therapist or a neutral person and get his advice
3. Learn to relax
4. Understand your birth cosmics. The following are some of the birth characteristics associated with generally angry persons:
4.1 Birth on Tuesdays and Saturdays store and harness more adrenalin resulting in anger and frustration
4.2 If your predominant element is fire the tendency to lose control and display emotions is high
4.3 When your middle chakra in your body is not in equilibrium you can fly into rage momentarily. The base chakra deals with hunger, the heart chakra deals with impulse and the middle chakra deals with anger. The coordination between these chakras is directed by the middle chakra. When it fails either hunger or impulse or both can make you blow a fuse. You know the proverb: an hungry man is an angry man
4.4 When your birth Moon is in Aries or Leo constellations
4.5 When your birth Moon is either in New Moon or in Full Moon Lunation Cycles
4.6 When your birth Moon is in either of the Lunar Mansions: Al-Sheratain, Al-Debaran, Al-Qalb, and Al-Jabbah
If you have any of these characteristics you have to do lot more in cooling off your hot temper. You are advised to wear light coloured clothes, use cooling gems and crystals such as pearls and moonstones, drink plenty of water and keep your stomach one third with solid foods, one third with liquids and one third empty.
You can contact me via E-mail cosmicgems@gmail.com or Webpage http://www.cosmicgemslanka.com
Muthu Ashraff
Cosmic Adviser